How to Talk to Women

Starting up a conversation with a woman can be intimidating.

Finding a good opening line is difficult. A compliment can come off as sleazy, some questions can seem a little intrusive, and it can be difficult to keep the flow of a good conversation if you are lucky enough to even start one.

Here are some tips to make it easier to talk to a woman, whether it is someone you have just met or a woman you have admired from afar for years.

1. Approach her with confidence.

Introduce yourself with a smile. Most women are approached often and may become wary of a man approaching her. If you are confident and relaxed, she will be more likely to feel the same way in your company.

One of the most important parts of approaching a woman is paying attention to unspoken clues. If a woman you do not know is surrounded by friends and engaged in a conversation with them, wait until she is on her own or with only one other person. A woman sitting in public alone is more likely to be open to being approached.

2. Comment on something other than how she looks.

Perhaps she is wearing an interesting item of clothing or is reading a book you have read. Look for things that point to her hobbies or interests.

By starting out with a question about something she likes, you will show that you are interested in her not because of the way she looks, but because of who she is as a person. It also allows her to talk about herself, which makes things easier on you.

3. Listen to what she has to say and then ask follow-up questions.

Instead of becoming anxious about what to say next or worrying about how to keep the conversation flowing, simply listening carefully to what the woman says and then asking for more details gives you a chance to ease into the conversation.

For example, if she is talking about belonging to a book club, you may want to ask what book she has enjoyed the most, or what kinds of books she likes to read. It also conveys to the woman that you are a good listener and that you care about what she has to say.

4. Talk about yourself with confidence.

When you do feel comfortable, you may want to offer up some details about yourself. Have a list of things you would like to talk about, such as hobbies, interests, vacations you may have taken in the past, or the kind of work that you do.

During a first conversation, try to keep these details positive and lighthearted. Avoid complaining about work or other things that may bother you.

5. Convey interest with your body language. When speaking to a woman, make sure that you are facing her and looking into her eyes.

If you are meeting a woman for the first time, it may be more comfortable for both of you if you are not standing too close to her. Keep her about an arm’s length away and do not touch her if you do not know her. You may feel more at ease if you have something in your hands, such as a glass or a book.